Marriage is not easy, do it and cherish it!
there is a proverb:
"Marriage is either heaven or hell."
I think only people who have experienced marital twists and turns can really understand it.
when it comes to marriage, I know that many people do not want to mention it, because the safe haven that they once looked forward to before marriage has become a training ground for abusive heart after marriage.
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in this practice field, there are three kinds of marriages, which are the most unbearable. Even if they are barely able to get to the end, they can only end up torturing each other.
couples who do not trust each other
have heard such a sentence:
"Trust is like water, most afraid of suddenly becoming turbid; trust is like a mirror, most afraid of breaking up accidentally."
Trust is the most sincere relationship between people, but sometimes it is also the most fragile.
especially in marriage, trust is like a glue that maintains the relationship between husband and wife all the time.
on the Internet, I saw a paragraph about the way the writer Ma Jiahui and his wife get along:
when writer Ma Jiahui was young, he was handsome and talented and had many fans, but his wife Zhang Jiayu would not feel uneasy or jealous.
Zhang Jiayu can rest assured that Ma Jiahui is busy with various fan signing parties and agrees to Ma Jiahui's proposal of "sleeping in separate rooms".
after 30 years of marriage, they work and live in separate rooms, and they do not interfere with each other, but they love each other. Behind all this, it is because of the support of trust.
A good relationship between husband and wife is always trusting each other, handing over each other's hearts, unguarded to each other, no one will hide it, solve things together, and everything will be fine for each other.
couples who do not trust each other, although living under the same roof and not on the same frequency, are suspicious of each other, have different dreams in the same bed, and do not have sense of security.
husband and wife do not trust each other, their thoughts cannot be synchronized, they cannot do things of one mind, and in the end, they can only consume each other, and their days are getting more and more tiring, and they even split up.
whether they are couples or lovers, only with the support of trust can they stay together for a lifetime.
Trust is there, love is there; when trust is broken, people break up.
each other only cares about their own husband and wife
"if a person loves you, there will be love in his eyes. If he does not love you, he will only have desires and demands."
I think so.
in marriage, once love disappears, all that is left is the selfishness of mutual defense. They no longer have tolerance and giving, they only have demands and demands.
I once saw a video of husband and wife divorce in Tencent News.
in the video, after the couple divorced, the woman pulled a truckload of things back to her mother's house, leaving no sheets left on the bed.
the young couple are married because of art before marriage, and after marriage, each is busy pursuing his own artistic career, and neither of them is willing to compromise for each other.
in daily life, when they don't have children, they argue about who does housework and order takeout when they eat.
later, when they had children, it was the old people who helped to take care of the children, and the couple were busy with their work and paid little attention to the children.
married for three years, because no one is willing to sacrifice for the family and make concessions, their conflicts deepened day by day, and the marriage finally parted ways.
the quality of marriage depends to a large extent on seeing each other, rather than living in your own world, worrying about gains and losses and being stingy with giving.
Lu Yao said this sentence in the ordinary World:
"True love is not selfish, but altruistic."
it is true that when husband and wife get along with each other, every time they give in a relationship, they save money in each other's emotional account.
and selfishness in feelings is like a ticking time bomb. Every time you save a little more, you will leave more hidden dangers. In a long marriage, it will break out one day.
only the marriage that is seen and heard can care more, listen and express more, and can make each other's mood happy and marriage sweet.
couples who quarrel when they encounter problems
"the deeper the love is, the more exacting it is, so it is impossible for lovers to quarrel without spirit."
No matter how good a relationship is, there will be disputes, and quarrels are like the spices of life, which are inevitable.
however, quarrelling when something happens is the most emotional drain.
because there are too many feelings quarrelling, hurt each other's hearts, resulting in feelings broken up, the midfield is separated.
in the MV of a song, the opening scene is a fierce argument between the heroine and her husband. Just as the angry husband picks up the picture frame of the family of three, ready to break everything and run away from home, everything presses the pause button.
the heroine thought of her childhood, when she watched her parents spend every day in quarrels, so her mother cried bitterly and couldn't sleep all night, so she had to sleep on sleeping pills.
my father lifted the table and scolded angrily, finally packed his bags, left home completely, and never came back.
at the end of MV, the hostess looked at the past and did not want her family to be the same as her parents'. Because the quarrel led to separation, she chose to take the initiative to embrace her partner and resolve a marriage crisis.
in fact, the white head is not a substitute for snow, and the acquaintance has already been signed.
when you calm down, look back and think whether the person who quarreled with you the most is also the one who once gave you support, hug and encouragement.
No relationship is plain sailing, and no matter how good a relationship is, there are frictions, and quarrels when you encounter problems are not temporary emotions, but depletion of each other's sincerity.
important things in marriageSpeak slowly; don't say hurtful words; discuss the matter between the two.
what is more important than quarrelling is to see your partner's emotions, accept him, and tolerate him.
Marriage has never been an one-man show. It requires two people to work hand in hand, work hard, and work hard for a lifetime.
Wise people know that a good marriage always needs to be managed.
only by trusting each other and sharing life can we help each other.
Let go of selfishness and bear the wind and rain together for a lifetime.
only when we tolerate and understand each other can we get sweeter and sweeter.
just as this sentence says:
"Marriage is a book, the first chapter is about poems, and the rest is plain prose."
Marriage is not easy, practice and cherish. May lovers keep trust, be less selfish, and be more tolerant. Only in this way can life be more and more enjoyable.