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psychologist Jane Loevinger pointed out that the psychological maturity of an individual depends on "how complex a person's experience of himself and the world can be."

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so, how to judge whether a person is mature or not?

Uncle wants to say that the more mature people are, the more they can keep a low profile on the following four things. if you do, it means you are quite mature and attractive.

when successful

keep a low profile

on the psychological level, there are too many people who habitually attribute their success to their own and their failure to the environment, while others' success to the environment and their failure to themselves.

some people begin to get carried away when they are successful, their inner "self" is constantly expanding, bragging about their achievements, bragging about what they are good at, and even bullying others, and finally getting carried away.

do not realize that there are mountains outside the mountains, but there are people outside the people.

the so-called maturity is the low-key and introverted quality that precipitated after being frivolous last year.

being able to keep a low profile and not be complacent when you have more achievements, material or fame than others, and when everything goes well, can prove that a person has really achieved mental maturity.

it is normal for some people in life to express themselves moderately, to show some of their achievements in a low profile, or to mainly share a mood.

when a person has achieved results will certainly feel happy, but also to consider the feelings of others, after all, some people are not satisfactory, if at this moment too much publicity, it will make others uncomfortable.

if it is too high-profile, it is easy to be envied and there is a danger of shooting a bird in the head.

there is another piercing truth:

failure is the mother of success, but success may also become the mother of failure if you are not careful. The conversion between the two depends on people's thinking and behavior.

people who like to show off in a high profile are lack of emptiness in their hearts.

people who like to show off are mostly arrogant and shallow.

and mature people can often not forget their original ideals and aspirations, will not be complacent and stagnant because of a little achievement, they are well aware of endless learning, will continue to improve themselves, and want to achieve more results.

the more mature people are, the more they understand that when others are inferior to you and need your help, don't always look superior, let alone deliberately laugh at or make things difficult for others.

on the one hand, this is to be kind for others, on the other hand, people are social, and there are times when you need help from others.

truly strong people never show their edge. They are expensive but not obvious, gaudy but not dazzling, do not condescend to get along with others, and know how to restrain. They always accumulate strength silently, are not impatient, and act like fools.

the more a person can keep a low profile in the face of flowers and applause in the face of success, the more he can achieve great things when he has more.

after all, low-key gorgeous, is the most advanced Versailles.

in the event of setbacks

keep a low profile

in life, you will meet people like this:

when you see that others get high marks in the exam, you say that you are cramming on the spur of the moment, otherwise you will definitely surpass him.

I don't work hard. When I watch my colleagues get promoted and get a raise, they say behind their back that they please the boss.

when he saw that his friend had a car and a house, he would blame his parents for having no money as soon as he paid his rent.

when something happens to them, they complain about God's injustice, throw the pot at others, and sell it miserably in moments, hoping that everyone knows his "pain".

what is the sign of a person's maturity?

there is a high praise on the Internet: "learn to control your emotions instead of being driven by it."

in the African prairie, there is a kind of bat lying on the Mustang to suck blood.

some horses began to get grumpy and died from shouting and kicking each other.

experts have found that the blood-sucking capacity of bats is simply not enough to kill horses.

so what is the culprit?

it turns out that the real cause of death of the Mustang is rage and out of control.

so when you encounter setbacks, you should keep calm, otherwise you will easily fall into the whirlpool of the "Mustang effect" and lose more and more heavily.

believes that whether a person's heart is mature or not depends on his state of dealing with problems.

it is only natural to talk to family and friends when things are not going well.

but blindly complaining or venting in a high profile will not solve the problem, but will only kill your own will, which will either bring trouble to others or become a laughingstock of others.

so more often, mature people do not easily reveal their misfortunes to others, but have the ability to digest themselves.

they know how to manage their emotions, do not flinch easily in the face of difficulties, can deal with problems in a low profile, think about solutions, and strive to change the status quo.

they are not frightened, can see clearly the way forward, will not make excuses for their own failure, and think that failure is also an opportunity for themselves to grow. They will carefully analyze the causes of failure and sum up experience from it.

from a psychological point of view, the ultimate goal of a person's maturity is to be able to accept the imperfect or even bad parts of himself and the world.

can not only balance their own internal contradictions and reconcile with themselves, but also reasonably transform their own negative emotions and actively coordinate and resolve external conflicts.Give up impossible goals and stick to what suits you.

Please remember that only when you keep calm can you turn defeat into victory.

instead of venting negative energy, it is better to counterattack quietly.

in the face of external evaluation

keep a low profile

at no time should you underestimate the power of flattery.

when you are in the highlight moment, the outside world will greet you with the best posture.

in the face of overwhelming praise, how many people can stick to their true heart?

if a person is bound by false praise, loses himself in flattery and yearns for the attention and worship of others more and more, he will eventually fall into the abyss of depravity.

believes that mature people do not necessarily have the ability to read minds and know people.

but their own mature mentality will help them automatically filter out a lot of hypocrisy.

Why is this?

because mature people tend not to be arrogant and impatient when they achieve success, they will be happy with the praise of others, but at the same time they will deal with these compliments rationally and will not be carried away.

they know very well that everyone has experienced success and failure.

you will naturally be praised when you are successful. Don't overestimate yourself, just as you will be laughed at when you fail, and don't underestimate yourself at that time.

or rejoice in things and not sorrow in yourself.

as a result, some of the outside world's deliberate ingratiation and false echo have suddenly become ineffective to them.

when it comes to socializing, they usually have a mature rule of making friends, that is, to maintain a relatively balanced relationship between themselves and their friends, which is neither self-centered nor compromise.

they will choose a circle of friends that suits them, even if they have fewer friends, but they are full of deep communication and trust, so that the relationship is more energetic and the friendship lasts longer.

people who are not mature enough often choose to "show it to others", live excessively in the secular evaluation system, and always rely on the evaluation of others.

in the face of praise, they are easy to lose their way in the overwhelming praise and be bound by some illusory things.

in the face of slander, they are prone to anger, even extreme behavior, or live in fear of being dominated by the eyes of others, as if some of their strengths no longer exist.

and the more psychologically mature individuals, the more they know how to pursue the essence of life: "reduce the bondage of meaninglessness and pursue freedom."

they do not like to mingle in circles, can distinguish what they should do, do not excessively injure themselves for the sake of gregariousness, know how to be alone as an opportunity to understand themselves, and see their inner true feelings and needs, so as to be the controller of their own life.

treat others' flattery with a normal heart, at the same time allow some of them to be disappointed in you, and gradually return to inner peace from the excitement outside, indicating that you are mature.

in the face of temptation

keep a low profile

have you ever heard of a famous experiment on delayed gratification designed by Walter Mitchell, a professor of psychology at Stanford University in the United States?

the researchers gave a group of 4-year-olds a piece of fudge each and told them that if they could wait for him to come back and eat the candy, they would get a second piece of candy, which would take 20 minutes.

if you eat candy before he comes back, you can't get a second piece.

then the researchers left, leaving the children and the seductive fudge.

years later, the researchers tracked the children who took part in the experiment that year and found that those who could bear to eat candy until the last minute were compared with those who ate candy first:

they are more self-controlled, determined, able to resist immediate temptations for longer-term results, and are obviously more likely to succeed.

think about children, not to mention adults.

mature people will not be confused by the prosperity of the outside world, will not be lost in the materialistic life, even if they achieve success, they can continue to hold a cautious attitude and move forward in a down-to-earth manner.

the temptation to sign a contract with an annual salary of millions of dollars on the one hand and going to school on the other.

which one should I choose?

the Internet celebrity Zhong Meimei, who is the most popular Internet celebrity who can imitate her teacher's demeanor at the age of 13, has been admitted to the best key high school in Heilongjiang Province: Harbin No. 3 Middle School through her efforts in the high school entrance examination that ended this year.

many netizens were surprised to see the news.

after all, an annual salary of $1 million is out of reach for most people.

but desire is like a bottomless pit. Is it wise to think calmly if you give up your studies early?

I am glad that Zhong Meimei and her parents have mature values. In the face of great temptation, they can make choices different from some Internet celebrities and will not take advantage of his overnight popularity to make money.

but to maintain a rare balance between the identity of "Internet celebrity" and "student".

his choice at this stage makes us look forward to the future development of this boy.

after all, only those who can stay awake in the face of temptation, know how to break up, and are responsible for their own life can live a better quality of life.

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the more mature people are, the less likely they are to judge a thing in black or white with a single absolute "right" or "wrong", but to look at everything from the perspective of diversity and development.

they always keep a low profile.To be a man, you should be neither arrogant nor impetuous when you are proud, nor humble nor arrogant when you are down.

win life with this advanced attitude towards life and open-minded wisdom.